foot+mouth=me
Why oh why do I speak without thinking? I would say 99% of the time I think very carefully about what I say and who I'm saying it to but the 1% where I just open my mouth and say what I'm thinking is the 1% when I really can't afford to...Yesterday I really upset my sister, I didnt mean to upset her - in my clumsy way I was just trying to reassure her but I didnt think about what I was saying and how I was phrasing it and now she's not speaking to me... Basically, she is quite stressed about breastfeeding and doesnt think baby is gaining enough weight, so she gave him a bottle of formula milk and she was saying that she is going to give him one bottle a day... then she started saying that maybe he wouldnt gain more weight that way and I said "yes he will gain more weight, of course he will, bottle fed babies do gain more weight than breast fed babies cos the milk is full of s**t" - what I meant was that because the milk contains more fat and sugar (cos its easier to regulate what goes into formula milk than breast milk) he will be bound to gain more weight - i wasnt saying this is a bad thing although the expression i used makes it sound like that - it was just an expression, not a very nice expression but still just an expression - it wasnt meant as a critisism. But she took it as a critisism and hung the phone up on me, when i tried to ring back she wouldnt answer and when i tried again later she still wouldnt answer, so I left a message trying to explain and to apologise but she hasnt rung me yet.
usually I would rationalise things to myself and phrase things to sound positive whilst still getting the message across but she caught me at a really bad time and I'm having a bad week anyway so I didnt think and just phrased it as it occured to me.
She didnt give me a chance to explain that although formula milk is full of s**t, so is breast milk, it has to be - babies need fat, sugar, salt, carbs, protein etc it's what makes them grow, so it wasnt a critisism! The reason babies gain more weight on formula milk is because all these things are measured, whereas in breast milk they are sporadic depending on what the mother eats - so its quite common in breastfeeding for a baby to gain 1/2oz one week and 12oz the following week - they still get all the nutrients they need but in a different way. I've never been a follower of weekly weighings for babies anyway, especially for breast fed babies - once a fortnight or once a month is enough - you can tell in between these times yourself if the baby is happy and growing.
I really really didnt mean to upset her and I just wish she would phone me so I could explain that and tell her how sorry I am that I did upset her!
posted by Anita @ 9:18 AM
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